Sometime last week, on my quest to have everyone and their mother (in many cases literally) watch
Ringer, I pitched the pilot to a co-worker. He in return told me it sounded a lot like the plot to
I Know Who Killed Me. If you don't what
I Know Who Killed Me is...well, what
Freaky Friday was to Lindsay Lohan's "teen" image, this film was to her "downward spiral" image.
And like magic (I'm fairly sure my co-worker is a magical movie leprechaun, so I think that word is appropriate)
I Know Who Killed Me ended up at Biglots, in a two pack along with one of my all time favorite films
I Know What You Did Last Summer, for 3 bucks. I knew had I not bought it right there and then, that I would've been struck down by lightning.
Cut to me watching it, over the course of three days. No, it's not that long...but it is longer than it should be.
Rather than break it down into a review, I decided to copy and paste the frequent comments/ thoughts I had posted on both MY Facebook wall as well as that of my two of my fellow co-workers. Also, out of courtesy, SPOILER ALERT!
Oh snap i'm peeling the label, oh Lindsay looks so excited. I'm the only one since the movie came out in theaters to actually watch her. Oh look at that. the dvd art is of a blue flower. It so looks like the font from I Know What You Did Last Summer. Explains the 2pak. And the dvd's in!
Oh wow it already looks bad. The first shot looks like it was shot with my [$]300 digi palmcorder I got from Costco 4 years ago.
oh look at that, a homage to high school theater...no wait that's just really bad acting on Lohan and that guy who looks like an extra from That 70s show.
omFg is that the cat from Austin Powers back from the dead? cos it look it.
oh snap she just lost some fingers. How ever will she grab ahold of that shiney bloody pole again?
I fell asleep. I Know Who Killed Me live blog pt 2: now wide awake...this film looks waaaay worse. I blame [co-worker]
Dear lord, that movie (i fell asleep last night during it)...is never gonna end. It's like the cockroach, it'll live on forever *shivers*
ok posession isn't the same time as a twin taking over somebody's identity without telling people. Two verrry different things *shakes head*
linds + strip/ dancing = cringe
ok, this movie is so ridiculously awful, I [can't] post anymore or [co-worker's] page won't see the light of day ever again
omg i'm still finishing it and now it turned into an episode of the bionic woman. *falls off bed laughing*
OMG she's literally in a room with falling SPARKLES! WTF is this movie becoming???
ok is that a tub full of blood...or still forming jello?
OMG he just bitchslapped her with her own faux skin what da faaaah???
Wait...HE'S the killer? I thought it'd be the manufacutor of all those robotic hand things. I assumed he was cutting all their limbs off so they'd be FORCED ot purchase faux limbs. 'Cause that would be genious...but this ending....what da faaaah???
OH SNAP! He got it in the groin.
OMG she's gonna use her robotic hand to punch in the glass coffin like Superman. :;gasp:: She DID it!
awwwe, now they're crying while the sappy music plays. This is so Uptown Girls, only with robotic hands, glass coffins, and sparkles.
No aftermath? Pfft, laaaame.
OK finished I KNOW WHO KILLED ME. It's a Lifetime movie told with a big movie budget. Ironically, I feel if it actually were a Lifetime movie it would've been pretty good.
You have been enlightened. You're Welcome :)
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